It really is always the happiest people, huh?

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Posted in Poetry

lullaby

Cars honking,

The occasional

Train whistle,

The TV in my parents’ room,

its volume turned down,

The flickering light

Reflects on the wall

Outside my room.

Nine floors up in the sky

But I can still hear

The dogs fighting

Over ownership of territory.

The sky is tainted

Orange, i remember

Thinking as a child

That god must have

Spilled orange juice;

When are we next going

To be able to see the stars?

My sister sleeps in the

Bed next to mine and I

Turn to look at her breathe,

An irrational fear poking

At the back of my head.  

It’s funny how it

Works: I reach back,

My hand brushing

Against the wooden headrest

And close my eyes, hoping

For a good night’s sleep.

Touch wood.

Posted in Poetry

a damsel in distress i am not

I was waiting

For someone

To come hug me

And hold me up

And love me and

Fill up that space

In my heart. I was

Waiting to see a cape,

A mask, a sign that

My superhero was here

To save me from myself but

I looked in the mirror

One day, my

Speakers blasting,

And i saw an arc reactor

In my chest, a shield

Strapped to my back,

A hammer in my hand.

It turned out that the

Superhero i had spent

So much time waiting for

Was me all along. If I

Couldn’t save myself,

If i couldn’t love myself,

It didn’t matter if someone

Else even tried.

I’m still training, I’m learning,

Discovering my powers

And it’s going to take a long

Time and I might give up

and curl up into a ball,

just wanting a break but

One day i’m going to get

There. I’m going to save

Myself and who knows,

I might just take over

The world too.

(Maybe I can help

Save someone else too.)

Posted in Things I Loved Reading/Listening To

epiphany – BTS

So weird, I for sure loved you so much

Adapted to you with everything, I wanted to live my life for you
But as I keep doing that I just can’t bear the storm inside my heart
The real myself inside the smiling mask, I reveal it entirely

I’m the one I should love in this world
Shining me, precious soul of mine
I finally realized so I love me
Not so perfect but so beautiful
I’m the one I should love

I’m shaking and afraid but I keep going forward
I’m meeting the real you, hidden in the storm
Why did I want to hide my precious self like this?
What was I so afraid of?
Why did I hide my true self?

I’m the one I should love in this world
Shining me, precious soul of mine
I finally realized so I love me
Not so perfect but so beautiful
I’m the one I should love

I wanna love in this world
Shining me, precious soul of mine
I finally realized so I love me
Not so perfect but so beautiful
I’m the one I should love
I’m the one I should love
I’m the one I should love
I know I haven’t posted anything proper in a really long time and I’m so sorry about that but I think I have some things in the work so maybe soon xx!! I miss writing and I can’t wait to get back into it.
Posted in Things I Loved Reading/Listening To

Mikrokosmos – BTS

Twinkling starlight

Building with blinking light
We’re shining brightly
In our own rooms, in our own stars

One light is ambition
Some light is rebellion
People’s lights
All are precious

This dark night (Don’t be lonely)
Like stars (We shine)
Don’t disappear
‘Cause you’re a big existence
Let us shine
Perhaps the reason this night looks so beautiful
Is not because of these stars or lights, but us

You got me
I dream while looking at you
I got you
Inside those pitch black nights
The lights we saw in each another
Were saying the same thing

Starlight that shines brighter in the darkest night
Starlight that shines brighter in the darkest night
The deeper the night, the brighter the starlight

One history in one person
One star in one person
7 billion different worlds
Shining with 7 billion lights
7 billion lives, the city’s night view
Is possibly another city’s night
Our own dreams, let us shine
You shine brighter than anyone else
One
Perhaps the reason this night looks so beautiful
Is not because of these stars or lights, but us
You got me
I dream while looking at you
I got you
Inside those pitch black nights
The lights we saw in each another
Were saying the same thing

Starlight that shines brighter in the darkest night
Starlight that shines brighter in the darkest night
The deeper the night, the brighter the starlight
City lights, this city’s star
I remember the night sky I saw when I was young
Where people are light
Where people are stars
In this place full of where
People are lights, people are lights
We shinin’
You got me
I breathe while looking at you
I got you
Inside those pitch black nights
Shine, dream, smile
Oh let us light up the night
We shine in our own ways
Shine, dream, smile
Oh let us light up the night
We shine just the way we are
Tonight
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na

Posted in Things I Loved Reading/Listening To

playlist

🧫 weakness – Jeremy Zucker

🧫 Symmetry – JT Roach & Emily Warren

🧫 the 1 – blackbear

🧫 Worst of You – Maisie Peters

🧫 The King – Conan Gray

🧫 Dazed & Confused – Ruel

🧫 my strange addiction – Billie Eilish

🧫 Woke Up Late (feat. Hailee Steinfeld) – Drax Project

🧫 Adore – Dean Lewis

🧫 Not Thinkin’ Bout You – Ruel

🧫 Who Do You Love – The Chainsmokers

🧫 ComeMyWay – JSPH

🧫 Superhero – Lauv

🧫 Lookalike – Conan Gray

🧫 Between The Raindrops (feat. Natasha Bedingfield) – Lifehouse

🧫 AFTER YOU – Meghan Trainor

🧫 Sunflower – Rex Orange County

🧫 You & Me – James Tw

🧫 Younger – Ruel

🧫 Loving Is Easy – Rex Orange County

🧫 Waves – Dean Lewis

🧫 Suitcase – James Tw

🧫 Be Alright – Dean Lewis

🧫 Afraid of Letting Go – Now United

Posted in Poetry

shut up, kapu

Here’s to screaming

At RCB to win at least

One match, debating

Instagram captions and

Making really bad Tiktoks.

I loved cheering for the

Cheerleaders with you,

Learning dances from videos

And annoying people in

The theatre by being too loud.

I’m going to miss rapping

Along with Ranveer Singh,

Making fun of each

Other’s faces and laughing

About our lack of friends.

Thank you for confiding

In me and I’m so happy

We became so close in

The past year (I hope

You know that.)

I’m going to miss seeing

You every single weekend

An hour after you were

Supposed to show up:

Taxi nahi mil rahi thi.

(Just because we’re moving does not mean that I will not make sure you get eight hours of sleep every single night. I gotcha, loser 💜.)

(I CAN’T BELIEVE THAT MY FREAKING HUNDREDTH POST IS A POEM ABOUT HOW I’M GOING TO SUPER MISS MY ANNOYING COUSIN AND HIS EGO.)(Oh well🤷, I don’t regret it.)